Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Fear Less

Last night as I lay in bed, I starting thinking about things going on in my life and my mind started to wander.  This is nothing new for me.  I often lose myself in thought.  It's like my secret escape.  I go down "What if" Street ... I linger a bit at "Would Coulda Shoulda" Road  and I peek inside the houses along "I Wonder" Way.  It's all pretty harmless and I don't allow myself to get too caught up in it all. 

But last night was different.

It got a bit darker on the "streets" I was wandering down.  I began to think about how fast time seems to be going lately and how much I wish I could slow it all down sometimes.  I thought about the Munchkin being five and thought how quickly five to forty five really is and then I thought about how fast my forty-five will be eighty-five and then I started to panic.

"What If" Street was no longer a happy place filled with possibilities.  It became a scary place filled with unfulfilled dreams.  "What if" I never get to do all the things I dream of doing, just like my sister didn't.  "What if" I never get the chance to create all the things I dream of creating.  "What if " I don't have what I need to get through tomorrow ... and the day after that ... and the day after that ... and so on.  "What if" my tomorrow never comes?

Yeah, it got really frightening and I began to feel like I couldn't catch my breath.  I felt so lost and alone.  To say I was scared would be an understatement.   I sent up a weak little prayer for help and wondered if anyone heard me.

He did. 

God heard my cry and swooped in and took me out of that dark and ominous place and brought me back to the light.  I recently read (so sorry I don't remember where so I can't give proper credit where it's due) that God gives us grace for today.  Tomorrow He'll give us grace for tomorrow and so on.  In other words, we don't have to worry about our tomorrows ...  rest assured God will take care of those too... instead, we can just focus on today and be confident that His grace will be sufficient.

That is such a freeing thought to me and it's what got me off the dark streets of panic last evening and back on "Living in the Moment" Lane ... a much better place to be.

"Do not be afraid of tomorrow; for God is already there."
Author Unknown


Courtney Walsh said...

grace for today...i'm holding on to that one!

Pamela said...

Me too!

yesterday's girl said...

With all the "junk" going on in my life recently this was a welcome reminder of where I want to be, in His Grace.

Pamela said...

yesterday's girl: I am glad my story helped. The Lord works in mysterious ways ... even blog posts:)
BTW: I still can't seem to comment on your blog, but I want you to know I love it! I can't wait to read more. I look forward to the day when I have a "room of my own" ... too soon enuff I am sure!